Beginnings

One would think that it was fairly easy to write about ones own life. Just start at the beginning and move forward through history until the present day is reached.

It isn't that easy. Much of my childhood is lost in the trauma of survival, some is jumbled and can't possibly be exactly as how I remember it. Some memories only exist in a series of photo like images that flash into mind and then are gone before I can really understand them. Others are two painful to contemplate and yet they will not be still, they will not be silenced.

It is time I think to allow them to speak, sometimes in the small voice and sometimes to shout. to give voice and words and articulate-ness to the inarticulate scream of a frightened child. She will not be silenced, not now, not anymore.

Come forth Child, for here you will be heard, here you will be safe.

Baby Blogger - Urgh!

I have conjunctivitis in both eyes and I am teething and I am a bit miserable! Apart from that I am happy and healthy and I am now 13 months old! We are going on holiday next week - I don't really know what that is but Peter seems very excited about something called a beach and the sea.

Love Eleanor xx

Hello,

I have had a new splint but my foot still does not seem right. I am at the hospital on friday so hopefully that will help.
We are going on holiday on Saturday but I have not yet got a bucket and spade. Mummy says she will definately get me one.
Ellie is cute but she cries when I sit on her - I don't quite understand why!

Love Peter xx

Health ....or not!

My husband Shane had the first of two ECG's yesterday. This was the sort done by a nurse who doesn't actually look at the print out but sticks it in a file and says the doctor will get back to you. His next ECG is one of those full blown exercise and at rest ones where they have you doing all sorts of stuff presumably to see if they can induce some sort of attack.

This all stems from the pleurasy he had at Christmas. He has been left with chest pain and shortness of breath. He has been given an inhaler for asthma and a GTN spray for angina, none of these conditions have as yet been confirmed.

My health remains rubbish. I was put on to different types of medication for the diabetes. My readings remain too high and the side effects of the drugs have resulted in almost constant diarrhoea. I am still extremely tired and increasingly frustrated.

On the up side the children have now recovered from their bout of illness and seem to be doing well. Peter is due to get a new splint for his left foot next week as the present one is now too small. He seems to grow at an alarming rate but is still in clothes for 18month-2yr old even though he will be three in June.

Eleanor gets cuter by the day. She is a real ray of sunshine with a smile that just blows me away. However bad things get I am a truly lucky woman to have such wonderful children. They keep things bright and cheery despite all the negatives of life at the moment.

The Mayfly Project

Blog hopping I came across a link to the Mayfly project. This basically is a site where you are invited to sum up your 2005 in 24 words or less. The lifespan of a mayfly is 24 hours.

Heres mine:

Pregnant.Baby Girl Born.
Stress, tired
Husband Gives Evidence in Murder Trial.
Maternity Leave Over.
another birthday.
Christmas is coming!
Husband has Pleurisy--Great!

Moon

I greeted the moon as I walked to work this morning. There she was in her half state, majestic and beautiful as she smiled down from her lofty place.

My cynical side enquired from deep within 'what are you saying hello to the moon for - it is just a big, dead, rock!'

Ah yes, I replied but the light from the sun gives it life and light and beauty and makes my heart warm to see her glowing there.

What a picture of what the Christ light does for us! We are cold and dead but in the light from God's Son we shine and come alive hopefully then spreading the light to others, radiating his light and love to a cold and lonely world.

Thank you Lord, for your indescribable gift!

Baby Blogger - My first Christmas Party!!

Hello,

Mummy took me to my first Christmas party yesterday - I was tired so I slpt through most of it! There was some singing and unwrapping a parcel that had been passed around a bit. I got something that mummy called 'white chocolate buttons' - it tasted odd so Peter ate them!

A funny looking man in a red suit with a white beard came. I sat on his knee and he gave me another parcel. This one was just for me and had a cuddly zebra book in it. Peter helped me unwrap it because I'm not very good at opening things yet.

I think I had a good time but it was all a bit odd!!

Eleanor xx

2005: A review.

As the year begins to draw to a close I thought I would take a look at the highs and lows of the family Blog.

At the beginning of the year Daddy Blog was facing the possibility of redundancy in fact he ended up being promoted - a mixed blessing! His work is now very stressful and involves overtime which leaves me having to feed, bathe and put to bed a 2 1/2 year old and a seven month old without any help. It works if Peter is happy to watch TV while I put the baby to bed.

Last year Daddy Blog was witness to a murder - this impacted on this year - worrying about making a statement and recriminations, awaiting the trial, giving evidence. At last, the murderer was sentenced to a minimum of 25 years and life began to return to normal.

I continued to feel ill with my second pregnancy and eventually celebrated the birth of Eleanor in May. She is a delight and a wonder.

I returned to work in October to find that internal politics and silliness was running on unabated. The new bod at the top has turned things upside down to the extent that no-one really knows what to expect next year.

My course continues to go well although I was ready to jack it all in a month or so ago. It all just seemed to be a bit too much. I have decided to only do the minimum two essays this academic year, so I should have filled that requirement by New Year. This should make the time until summer a little less stressful.

Peter continued to cope well with his hemiplegia and was making good progress. The glandular fever he was diagnosed with in November has slowed him down a bit but hopefully he will pick up a bit after the excitement of Christmas. He is still very tired and in some areas of his develpment he has taken a step backward.

Eleanor is thriving. She is a little podge and totally adorable. She sleeps through the night - something her older brother is yet to achieve.

My Film of the Year - not having seen many I think it waould have to be Wallace and Gromit - and the Were-Rabbit closely followed by Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.

My Book of the Year - again I haven't really read much but my vote would be for Thud by Terry Pratchett.

Album of the Year - I haven't recieved it yet but I can safely say that it will be Deep Blue by Martyn Joseph!!